Getting to know you, getting to know all about you — or — the piece from yesterday — continued.
1) I’m seeing something in four quadrants of the composition: a totem (I’m aware that there always seems to be one in this area, but haven’t a clue what it means or what to do about it — right now I’m not resisting it) in the upper left; an “astronaut” (I’ve drawn something similar before — different but the same somehow — not sure what to do about that either) in the upper right; a ski slope, or a sloping shoulder, in the lower right; and a mask with bloodshot eyes crowded in jumble in the lower left center. The original figure is gone. I am “purely” in the space between what I observed and what I was experiencing. Nothing makes sense to me. I think I need to re-emerge the original figure. I’m being too timid. I’m only looking at what is on the canvas and not trying to see through it. I’m trying too hard to make the little elements work. Nothing feels connected. Nothing feels bold.
2) I decide to push the “negative space” so I can separate what I’m seeing from what I’m not. I need to concentrate on the space between my four little guys. Less white. More neutral color. Suddenly, I catch a glimmer of a larger, encompassing shape in the shadow.
3) Four cascading pink lines emanate from the source of what I sense I see. Four areas are color blocked to see what connects. The totem still lives out on the edge. The “astronaut” is in the “head” of the new larger figure. The ski slope shoulder gets a head partially obscured by the new head. It gets flushed with bold color. I’m seeing and sensing a connection, intimacy, warmth, and comfort. This is what was in the studio when I did the original figure sketch — Isaiah all relaxed, exposed, and curled up on the couch.
4) An “arm” embracing the combining figure appears. A sense of holding on and pulling in. I see activity instead of separate ideas floating in their own space. This is different. The mask needs to be removed or at least toned down. The totem and “astronaut” stare at each other across the space between as the two fore-figures “kiss.”
Even though the world feels separate there are ways to be connected.
We’ll see how I feel tomorrow.